Soul-Food, Italian Style

I’m sitting at a table at one of my favorite Italian restaurants. Mary’s my waitress. At the end of the meal she brings me the check and we engage in some small talk about her major and what she wants to do after college. I sense the lack of enthusiasm in both her...

What To Do When Your Universe Collapses

It seems natural to want to go back to the person you were after you’ve lived through a tragedy. After all, that’s a comfortable choice. It feels safe. But it’s unrealistic. Because we can never go back to who we were after our Universe collapses. The alignment of who...

Against a Wall

When Mom left this world not long ago, the emotional upheaval and profound sense of loss and loneliness was something I had never experienced before. Five months later, I still find myself expecting her to round the corner or ask me to check out one of her new...

Finding the Light In a Sea of Sadness

I spent fifteen years in a self induced relational coma, convinced that a former lover’s painful words were my truth, rather than her reality. That’s roughly 5500 days of consciously avoiding intimacy with women. And even though it would be easy to view those days as...

What’s Your Answer to Life’s Most Important Question?

Lately I’ve been thinking alot about the two primordial emotions of life, Love and Pain, and all of the sub-emotions that arise from them. And what’s interesting to me is that, even though love is our nature and pain is learned, we tend to live in pain and long for...